12 Nov Dealing with Temper Tantrums: A Parent’s Guide

Temper tantrums are normal for toddlers. They can’t always say how they feel, so they cry, yell, or throw themselves down to communicate. Most tantrums last just a few minutes. Usually, they’re not a sign of a big problem—it’s just part of growing up nspcc.org.uk+15summerhealth.com+15mayoclinic.org+15.

Why Do They Happen?

Tantrums often come from:

• Frustration – they want something but don’t have the words or skills to get it
• Being tired or hungry – even small things feel worse when basic needs aren’t met familydoctor.org
• Wanting control – toddlers want independence and may react when they can’t decide

• Too much happening – loud noises, busy places, or new situations can cause overwhelm reddit.com+9nspcc.org.uk+9tommeetippee.com+9

How to Prevent Tantrums

1. Keep a routine – set regular times for meals, snacks, naps, and bedtime steppingstoneschool.com+13mayoclinic.org+13psychcentral.com+13
2. Plan ahead – go out when they’re not too tired or hungry; bring a snack or toy reddit.com+3mayoclinic.org+3familydoctor.org+3
3. Give choices – offer simple options like “red shirt or blue shirt?” reddit.com+10mayoclinic.org+10reddit.com+10
4. Praise good behavior – say things like, “Great job waiting quietly!” verywellfamily.com+15familydoctor.org+15mayoclinic.org+15
5. Avoid triggers – if a toy is off-limits, keep it out of sight tommeetippee.com+15psychcentral.com+15parents.com+15

How to Respond During a Tantrum

1. Stay calm – your calm helps your child calm down timesofindia.indiatimes.com+15steppingstoneschool.com+15childmind.org+15
2. Validate feelings – say, “I see you’re really angry.” Keep it brief nypost.com+11matrescence-therapy.com+11reddit.com+11
3. Keep them safe – if they’re in danger, gently remove them from the situation
4. Ignore attention-seeking tantrums – don’t give in; attention can reinforce them verywellfamily.com+15parents.com+15tommeetippee.com+15
5. Distract when you can – offer a toy, point out something interesting, or try a funny face parents.com+3psychcentral.com+3mayoclinic.org+3
6. Use a timeout if needed – 1 minute per year of age, in a quiet spot psychcentral.com+2mayoclinic.org+2familydoctor.org+2

After the Tantrum

• Comfort your child – when they calm down, give a hug and say, “Glad you’re okay.” reddit.com+8matrescence-therapy.com+8mayoclinic.org+8
• Talk briefly – say what happened and suggest using words next time: “You were upset about that toy. Next time, tell me.”
• Praise calming down – a simple, “You did great calming down,” builds their skills reddit.com

Extra Tools & Tips

• Deep-breath exercises – practice “flower and candle” breathing when things are calm ladifferencepediatrics.com
• Social stories – short stories about feelings can help them learn what to doladifferencepediatrics.com+1parents.com+1
• Mirror technique – you mirror their emotion with a funny or sad face to help them feel seen and calm thesun.co.uk

When to Get Help

Most tantrums fade away by age 3–4. Talk to your pediatrician if:

• Tantrums last too long or are very strong
• Your child hurts themselves or others during them
• Your child seems upset all the time afterward mayoclinic.orgpsychcentral.com

Final Thoughts

Tantrums are a normal and important part of a toddler’s development. With calm and consistent care, you can guide your child to learn healthy ways to handle big emotions. It takes time, patience, and love—but you’re doing a great job!